Oh, yes, it’s … snowing!

We have to apologise for these really scarce semi-stories, but due to heavy snow, it’s difficult for letters to travel so.. they stay home, so they won’t catch a cold or who knows, even freeze! And, of course, they enjoy a nice cup of tea. ^.^

You’d imagine that during these times, the ice-cream monster becomes melancholic, and snow reminds him of the island where he comes from, of his home. But well, you’d get all wrong. He’s calmly baking some chocolate biscuits right now. :-)

Aaaand, to make up for time divided by zero, there’s a special something that we found:

Tea!

Funny thing has the giant lazy panda found on the Internet:

Now, the question is… why isn’t there a song about tea?

I love tea,

I drink it during breakfast,

I drink it during lunch,

I drink it during supper,

And before hitting the bunk.

Smile, you’re an alien.

And here we are, back after our little amnesia. Well, good thing we had our memories stored on the central hard drive, so no major loss. Wait, we’re not robots. Ah wait, that’s what you think. Almost forgot.

~

Yes, nice trick: if aliens look like robots and they have changed their appearance to resemble humans (why on Naboo would they want that?!), how can you tell them apart?

We came up with two possible solutions to this problem:

One, suggested by the giant lazy panda, would be to start drinking tea in front of the ‘creature’ you’re suspecting of being an alien robot. And on yer table has to be another cup of tea, from which you haven’t drunk yet. If the suspect smiles as you or asks if he/she can join for a cup of tea or asks about the weather, then there’s no reason to be suspicious. Enjoy yer tea, that’s just a human. Or a very smart alien, because it learns quickly humans’ habits. But the idea is that humans can’t be immune to tea. Thus, if it doesn’t want tea, it’s suspicious.

And the second solution was proposed by the ice-cream monster. Well, you probably guess what his idea is. Yes, of course it involves chocolate, what else could it be? Rather hard to trick an alien with chocolate, but… ‘if it works with toddlers, why wouldn’t it work with aliens too? ‘ (that’s ice-cream monster’s view of this problem).

And then of course, it’s the bonus way of solving the problem: ask the suspect to watch the following video — if they smile, they’re either humans or laughing at humankind. But if they sigh, they’re most certainly humans. ^.~

Rain, dear rain.

If that wasn’t the strangest thing that happened to us, then I don’t know what was it!

There were we, at the local museum, drooling at some fancy paintings. How we got there, or why we went there, we simply had no idea. Also, why so early in the morning? It was just a little bit past 7 o’clock and the museum was empty, nobody was there except for us and the old lady that sells tickets. We had that strange feeling that something was missing, and what’s stranger is that all of us was feeling that way. Rather peculiar, I daresay. So we finished the tour and when it was the time for ice-cream, it started pouring, all of a sudden. So, quite obviously, we continued our stroll down the city (you know we love rain an awful lot). But who would have expected to see a cloud coming so close to Earth? Or, at least, that’s what the giant lazy panda thought it was. But then imagine the surprise we had when a little girl came out of that weird cloud looking thing. She smiled at us and began walking towards us. We had the feeling we knew her, but couldn’t remember a thing! Were we scared when, she, staying at something like 3-4 feet close to us, started acting strangely, turning into a pale blue, from head to toes, and then… those glittering eyes! They were everywhere… Eating our ice-cream and virtually eating the rain! Yes, I tell you, eating the rain! Ha, fancy that now! Such a peculiar phenomenon, it was, most certainly, pouring, but no drop of rain was touching the ground. That creature was eating it! And well, she seemed delighted by its taste. Oddly enough, as the gentle rain became more of a storm, the creature began to resemble a human again: blonde hair, big blue eyes, not too tall, and probably quite young, wearing a blue dress.

Was that an alien? Why, of course not. Then what was it?

A creature that enjoys eating rain. Plain simple.
~

And then we got home and after having a cup of tea, we all read here about Alice’s visit. Who’s Alice? :O

It wasn’t magic.

Why, of course we hope you had a merry un-birthday tea party yesterday! And the day before it and so forth.

~

Well, that’s what Alice wanted us to tell you, no matter if you’re a human, a zombie, an alien or whatever has an Internet connection and a keyboard. And a mouse. Ah you got the idea. Trapped in a jar. Teeheehee.

Well, well, quite surely you’re curious about what happened with today’s arrival of Alice. Or maybe not, but doesn’t matter, because we’re still typing and you’re not here to stop us. Bwhahaha. Alright, moving along.

First and foremost, we were taken aback by her arrival: we all thought she was going to come by plane, but well, of course she didn’t! That would’ve been too boring for her. She came following a yellow brick road, being leaded by a Cheshire cat whose tail was dancing waltz. And, as they were approaching, music was to be heard and then everything made sense: a rainbow coloured stave full of musical notes was flying like a cloud above them and after a note was played, it would turn into a human-like face from cartoons and grin at who knows what particles of dust in the air; followed by Alice sneezing. She hasn’t changed a bit in all these years! She looked up to the sky and said “Strangerer and strangerer”, just as she said when she got in Wonderland for the first time. Funny thing, she didn’t seem to notice all those people who were walking towards her and who were most definitely going to bump into her. She wasn’t paying any attention to cars when she crossed the street. It was as if there was only their yellow brick road and nothing of this hectic bee hive we call ‘city’. That was indeed strange, I daresay. And what was stranger was the fact that they seemed to practically fade away as they were coming closer to us. Well, it wasn’t the weather, for sure. And then, while we were thinking at what this strange sighting meant, they stopped in front of us, and the rest of the yellow brick road was suddenly erased. She looked into my eyes and smiled. I think she remembered me from that tea party, a while ago.

Then we all gazed in her bluish-grey eyes: they were empty! I mean, of course they were there, but they… well, weren’t really there. (remember Schrödinger’s cat — it’s not like that).  Then, the demon-clown considered polite to shake hands with the Cheshire cat. But they couldn’t! Nor could we hug Alice or the cat!

Because they were ghosts!

Quite a shock when you think a bit. Cartoon characters – to turn into ghosts? Weren’t they supposed to live ever and forever, as long as there’s at least one person whose imagination fuels their lives? Then, what’s with this? A system error? Alice just nodded and said: “Too bad we can’t taste the tea anymore. An un-birthday tea party means nothing without it.” Then she walked through the door and took a seat in the living room. The Cheshire cat was near her, and both looked so gloomy, as if they weren’t themselves. We had practically no idea of what to do. Of all possible scenarios, we weren’t expecting this. And, while silence was taking its seat in our meeting, both Alice and the cat started to fade more and more, until they were almost invisible. And they did get invisible. They were nowhere to be seen – our guests vanished. Then some strange noise was coming from giant lazy panda’s kitchen. We all rushed there, just to be taken aback, once again, by something we weren’t expecting (again!): there they were, Alice, the cat, the Mad Hatter and his companions, sitting at our kitchen table, having tea and singing: “We hope you have a merry merry un-birthday!”, followed by a march of chocolate cakes, one for every creature in the room. What to say now? They really fooled us! Alice then explained the Cheshire cat’s prank: they couldn’t have come there as mere guests — they’re more than that! So they decided to play a prank on us.

Very funny, Alice. Very. We were worried sick.

But we still had lots of cake. And tomorrow we’re going to the museum and afterwards, the ice-cream monster will show us his latest culinary creation.

Well, Alice, be careful though: the demon-clown is thinking at something evil.

Have a very merry un-birthday!

Remember how Alice wanted a world of nonsense and she got to Wonderland?

Well, we’ve been debating this for quite some time now (thus our absence) and we’ve finally agreed on something: we’re going to invite Alice round for the week-end! Isn’t that marvellous? Ahh we can’t wait till she gets here and tells us the real story of Wonderland. Because, I hope you already know that what is written in those picture books.. are all made up! Alice told me once, when we happened to have tea together: gloomy adults change their stories so they’re practically slicing the real stories, so humans won’t get too much fantasy, because they are afraid of what might happen! After all, they might be right a tiny little bit, imagination is tremendously powerful, and if fallen in who knows whose hands, it could get quite nasty. But still! It’s humans’ right to imagination!

Moving along… The giant lazy panda said he’s going to make a surprise for the week-end Alice comes by, and well, we all wonder what that is! Most certainly is a new kind of tea, because we all know the giant lazy panda way too well, and tea is the sole thing on his mind! Teeheehee! Additionally, the ice-cream monster promised to bake a Wondero-gigantico-choco- biscuit – we have yet to discover what that is, because it will be the very first time when he bakes it. Actually, the ice-cream monster bakes something new, utterly different and unusual every week-end. The last one was a… let’s call it cake, in the shape of Robin Hood winking. It was really tasty and we nom om nom nom-ed it in no time! Ah, the demon-clown smiles when remembers it.

Anyway, it’s time for tea (as usual) and for getting things done for Alice’s arrival.

^.~

Ice-creamed tea, anyone?

Well, while enjoying these brain freezing winter days, we came up with an idea!

What if we would froze tea? I mean, just brew some tea, as usual, and then leave it in the snow, outside. Not abandon it, of course, because it would feel lonely and blue and that’s not fair and people who abandon their tea are bad people! And well… we’re not even people, haha!

Well, the idea is to actually make ice-creamed tea. Or ice-tea-cream. But not ice-tea! No, no, of course not! I think it would taste better if we added more milk into it, oh yes, of course.

But shh, don’t say a word about this to the giant lazy panda! We want to surprise him with ice-creamed tea at our next supper. I’m quite sure he’ll love it. He loves everything that has some tea in it. Even if it’s just an idea.

<(^.^)>

PS: We’re looking for a group to build a giant snow-man that loves tea. Of course we can’t sprinkle him with tea because it would look as if acid rain fell on him and the corrosive effects are commencing their natural dance.

Secret secret equals no secret.

Alright, the giant lazy panda thought it could share his recipe for yummy tea with you. But be warned, stranger, this tea isn’t for everybody. I mean, it’s not a racist tea or something similar, jolly Santa, of course not! It’s just that you need to have lots of patience to… make it ;-}

Okay, here’s how it’s made:

Firstly, you have to wait for a rainy day. A really rainy day, and that means that it has to rain for more than 3 hours and the rain has to be light and a bit warm, but not too warm, yet somehow cool. And it must not be acid rain! Probably it’s better to try this during summer, dunno. Alright, moving on. What you have to do, in the first place, it’s to make sure that none of yer neighbours are out in their garden. Then, you can go in the middle of it (it must not be covered and it has to be raining) and then you start dancing the rain. Dance like there’s nobody, because there really is nobody, and as if that day it’s the only one there won’t be anyone around so take advantage of it and dance like there’s no tomorrow. Ah of course, don’t do this naked. You’ll catch a cold! And astronauts/aliens could see you from the outer space! Alright, after having danced for at least… let’s say… eh doesn’t matter, because once started, you’ll be not that easily stopped from dancing in the rain (it’s magical, I tell you!). Fair enough, let’s assume you’ve finally stopped. Quite surely the rain has stopped too meanwhile, so you should be seeing a rainbow above yer head. If you can’t see it, imagine there’s one until you really see it. I told you there’s one. And if you still don’t see it (stubborn rainbow case), just call yer house gnome and ask for some assistance. They can communicate with leprechauns that live at the end of the rainbow and make it visible for yer eyes. Ok, assuming you finally have yer rainbow, smile at it. But don’t just throw in that bored photograph smile. Nobody likes that! Smile until the rainbow smiles back to you (no worries, it won’t take long!). Then, the rainbow will start singing. You have to listen to him carefully and you can join in if you know the lyrics. He won’t mind, I’m sure. You can continue doing this until the rainbow goes to sleep (they sleep an awful lot!). By then, you should get quite tired too. You should get inside as well, in the house. Then in the kitchen. Then drink the tea someone has made for you. See how great it tastes?

Call it the rain-dance-rainbow-smile effect. It has no scientific base, but it works. Just like an axiom from Mathematics.

~

Just because the Universe is made of tiny pieces of Mathematics.

We saw the real rain.

And heeeeeere we are, back from outer space!

~

As you’ve probably already imagined by now, we’re back from one of our amazingly adventurous trips! And of course, the question, what have we visited this time? Well, well, this time we met … aliens!

Yes, yes, aliens! And they’re not green, nor do they have big froggy-like eyes, oh no no, at least not the ones we’ve met. ^.^

On the peaceful planet of [we're not allowed to say its name] reside  some marvellous creatures. They are probably one of the most beautiful phenomenons  I’ve ever seen: they change their colour as they walk, always keep all the rainbow’s colours, but creating some sort of shapes and patterns with it. They have only one foot, and at the end of it there are three little wheels, by which they move, as you can imagine. And they control those wheels using their mind. Oh yes, they use their mind an awful lot more than we do! They don’t have hands, either. There are just a couple of wires, every one of them differently coloured, each for every set of chore/activity. Their face doesn’t resemble the humans’, because they don’t have a head. They actually have a balloon filled with Helium instead of a head! (I’m still not sure if our amazement towards their appearance hasn’t offended them). But enough of this!

There is only peace. Really, can you even imagine this? Their serenity is simply endless. It would be like infinite in Mathematics. And not only those creatures, but the place, the atmosphere, the nature, everything is so. And yes, I said ‘nature’, even though it isn’t that nature you usually see while taking a stroll down the city’s park. There, grass isn’t green. Actually, there isn’t any grass there. Nor water. And the air is changing its chemical components so it suits every creature that passes by that planet, because it’s some sort of resort. But I won’t describe the visitors, it’s better to stick with that planet’s inhabitants – they’re so interesting. Well, first and foremost, they don’t drink or eat. Oh no no, they’re well beyond this let’s say primitive stage. When you actually need to do these in order to survive. While they are so complex as creatures, they actually lack what we call technology. Yeap, no Internet there.

I dare say, they are some sort hippie aliens. But well, not really, as we’ve noticed that the visitors weren’t using any devices either. Might it be that they’ve gone such a long way in developing technology that it is actually inside of them? Or have they started a new era, of non-technology, after meeting the limits of technology? That might be quite interesting — imagine the power of the mind being materialised via technology — I dare call it perfect blend. (not that we believe in perfection — not even in Tea World is there such thing).

Okay, okay, enough with this description already.  We’ll tell the most interesting thing we’ve noticed at these creatures. Remember, I told you they do have ‘nature’, right? Right. For them, nature is rain. It’s just that, of course, it doesn’t rain with water, quite obvious. It’s some strange powered liquid, quite fluffy, warm and gives you a funny feeling when you feel it for the first time on yer skin (yes, only our group had skin though). It’s like it is mending with yer inner world, creating a bridge between different dimensions in yer soul and it makes yer mind feel so relaxed that you can probably even solve amazingly difficult Maths problems or mysteries that not even Sherlock can solve. You could say it gives you power. But it’s more than a feeling ^.^

And here’s the thing. There’s one sole evil on that planet, just one type of crime that can be committed. To use an umbrella. Sounds funny, dear earthling?

Well, an umbrella is a crime against rain.

Sea of Tea.

Saaaaailing, oh yeees, we’re saaaaaailing …

In a seeeea of teeeeeaaaaa !

—